Advice for New Moms: What I Have Learned as a Baby Nurse for 10 Years
For as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to support mothers and their babies. That calling led me to nursing, and for the past 10 years, I’ve been a baby nurse helping families during one of the most vulnerable moments in life — childbirth.
I have been a part of hundreds of deliveries, and I have learned a great deal along the way. I currently work at a hospital where my role allows me to be the first hands to care for babies right after birth. Sometimes that means helping them recover from routine transitions.
Other times, it means supporting babies in distress, including those with birth injuries, and guiding mothers through those first emotional hours of postpartum care.
Over the years, I’ve collected many lessons worth sharing. These are some of the most important pieces of advice I offer new parents.
1. Advocate for Yourself and Your Baby
It is important that you voice your wants, concerns, and any questions you have throughout your pregnancy, during labor, and after giving birth.
If you feel something is not right, trust your gut and speak up. If you are concerned, ask for a second opinion. Be an advocate for yourself when you need to be, and do not be afraid to voice a worry or ask for more clarity before medical decisions are made.
Unfortunately, medical malpractice during childbirth is a reality, and a single error can affect your family forever.
2. Accept the Change
Once your baby is here, there will be a lot of changes in your day-to-day life. Your baby will need to eat every three hours, might have difficulty with feedings, will have dirty diapers often, need to be rocked to sleep, need to be comforted, and will have fussy moments.
For some families, especially those whose baby experienced a birth injury such as cerebral palsy, daily life could feel even more overwhelming, and the changes may be more permanent.
Life will look very different for a while. When you’re in it, the days can feel so long and the problems never-ending. Even though your path may not look like what you expected, you’ll find moments of connection and strength along the way.
It’s okay not to feel like yourself. You will find your groove and your way back to normalcy — or a new normal — soon enough.
3. Learn What to Expect
Newborns are unique, and it can be scary not knowing if something is wrong. I advise my patients to focus on learning what’s typical in the early days.
For example, babies naturally breathe faster and more irregularly than adults. They have sensitive skin and often get rashes. It's also important to understand their basic needs. They have to eat frequently, sleep often, and need physical touch to thrive.
You are your baby’s greatest comfort. Holding them when they cry isn’t spoiling — it’s how they feel safe. Quick responses help meet their emotional and physical needs and strengthen your bond.
Other normal signs include having thick, black stool called meconium for the first couple of days, which then turns into yellowish-brown liquid stool that often leaks from diapers.
If babies do not burp after feeding, they may experience stomach pains and require assistance in releasing the gas. You will quickly learn the unique things about newborns.
It is important to know what the norms are so that you can spot a change in breathing, feeding, or sleep and respond. These can be signs of a birth injury, signaling the need for immediate medical help.
4. Ask for Help
You may feel as though you do not want to inconvenience someone else, but the newborn stage is very difficult to handle alone, especially if your baby has medical needs or you're still processing a traumatic birth.
Family, community, and external support matter. Voicing your needs to those you trust is crucial in the newborn stage.
If your baby has been diagnosed with cerebral palsy — or you're still waiting for answers — you’re not alone. There are support organizations and groups dedicated to helping families like yours find connection, resources, and hope.
When family or friends reach out, be specific about what you need, such as help holding the baby so you can nap, assistance with dinner, or an extra hand with cleaning the house.
If someone asks if they can bring you something, let them know if you need a coffee, have just run out of diapers, or if the baby has developed a rash and now needs diaper rash cream.
People who offer to help do so because they care about you and understand how challenging this stage can be. They want you to rest and help support you, so accept it, even if it's difficult.
5. Trust Your Instincts
It is important to prepare as best you can for bringing a baby into the world and entering into motherhood, but there is no way you can know it all. There is a lot that you will have to figure out along the way.
Trust your instincts when it comes to knowing what your baby needs — a mother’s intuition is often right! Remember, you are your baby’s safe place and comfort. You know your baby better than anyone else.
If something doesn’t feel right, such as your baby not reaching milestones, moving differently, or not responding as expected, speak up. Developmental delays can sometimes be early signs of a deeper issue, and it’s okay to ask questions.
You will learn their behaviors quickly and know what they need, so trust that feeling. Keep learning from others and do not dismiss education, but take into account the instincts you naturally are gifted with as a mother.
6. Give Yourself Grace
You are going to make mistakes. You will learn and grow. We want to believe that we can have it all figured out right off the bat and that any mistakes mean failure, but that’s not true, and it's unachievable.
Take it day by day and remind yourself that you are doing your best. Give yourself affirmation throughout the day and tell yourself that you are a good mother.
If your baby experienced a birth injury, you deserve support and financial assistance. Many families are left with questions and never get the full story about what happened during labor or delivery. It’s okay to want answers.
Call us at (855) 220-1101 to talk in private. Our team includes registered nurses who listen, answer questions, and help families figure out what to do next, even if you don’t have a diagnosis yet.
7. Take Care of Your Mental Health
If you notice any signs of anxiety or depression, such as losing sleep from worry or not wanting to take care of yourself, it is important to seek help. This new stage can be exhausting and overwhelming, especially if your birth experience was traumatic or your baby needs extra care.
If you do not take care of yourself, you cannot properly take care of your baby. You need to eat well, get sleep, and reset yourself each day. Take time to do small things that bring you joy and lift your spirits.
Reach out to someone you trust on the hard days, and give yourself credit for showing up — even when it feels impossible.
Support for the Road Ahead
Over my 10 years as a baby nurse, I have seen and learned a lot about labor, birth, and caring for newborns. Becoming a new mom is one of life’s most beautiful and challenging experiences.
My hope is that these pieces of advice offer reassurance and encouragement as you navigate early motherhood. Remember, you don’t have to do it all alone — lean on your support system, ask for help, and take care of yourself, too.
Your journey is unique, and every family’s path is different.
If your baby was injured during labor or delivery, you may have unanswered questions. Our team is here to help families figure out what went wrong and whether medical negligence was involved.
Call us right now at (855) 220-1101 or get a free case review to see if we may be able to help.
Written by:Katie Lavender, RNKatie Lavender has over 10 years of experience as a Registered Nurse in postpartum mother/baby care. With hands-on experience in Labor and Delivery and a role as a Community Educator for newborn care, Katie is a staunch advocate for patient rights and education. As a Medical Reviewer, she is committed to ensuring accurate and trustworthy patient information.
